Category: News and Views
If you were running for president, what would be your platform? What would you change?
My platform? Well I could say that I'd abolish the USA and restore the lands to Her Majesty, but I don't think I'd get elected on that platform so will leave that policy till after the election eh? Well, I'd do the following: abolish juries in civvil trials, pass legislation to hault the compensation culture, and abolish punitive damages in tort cases with the exception of torts interfering with the liberty of the person such as wrongful arrest. I would introduce a National Health service there, as it really is about time you had one and it's a disgrace the way health is run in your country. i'd next take the appointment of senior judges out of the hands of the president, and put it in the hands either of a judicial appointments commission made up of senior judges themselves, or introduce a post not unlike Lord Chancellor. I would sign you guys up to the international criminal court as well, because your politicians are completely misinformed about what it does: the international criminal court principally exists to bring to justice war criminals who are not tried by their own states, like Saddam Hussein and I'm sure you Americans would like to see him brought to justice, wouldn't you? So, for the US, the court would be no threat to your sovereignty and you could actually have a say in its running for a change. Anyway back to the manifesto: I would undertake a comprehensive review of the education system to ensure that the learning of foreign languages, for example, was compulsory up to the age of sixteen, and with a view to increasing global awareness whilst not losing a sense of the American culture of which you are rightly so proud. I would sign America up to the Kyoto protocol on the environment, because again, I don't understand why Mr Bush is not in favour of reducing greenhouse gas emissions or regulating the disposal and recovery of waste. I would end the trend towards isolationism that Woodrow Wilson failed to stop, and we all know what that resulted in. America's an invaluable member of the international community and I fear that the current regime has forgotten that. So, vote Lawlord, you know it makes sense!
Additionally, I would seek to revoke the amendment giving all Americans the right to bear arms. It does not make the country safer, and just gets the felons to up the stakes. We don't have that right in britain, and a jolly good thing too. I would liaise with the various police departments to improve police and community relations, along the same lines taken by the mayor of Seattle in the so-called 'operation wheed and seed' which sought to remove criminals from the community but at the same time provide facilities to divert the community's young away from criminality. i would sack all the gun-ho commanders such as the stupid idiot who proclaimed 'laids and gentlemen, we got 'im!' after the capture of Sadam Hussein as if he were the good guy in some action thriller. The military would then be scanned to find suitable commanders who understood that their role is peacekeeping. More will follow I'm sure, but vote Lawlord, you know it makes sense!
DONT! encourage him.smile
I would categorically refuse to enter in to any war and abolish the nuclear defence policy.I would transfer the moeny to health,rights for disabled people and pass a law that would ensure that all newly blind/vi people or those blind/vi from birth recieve the right kind of support and rehab to live indepedent worthwhile lives.I'd immediately sever ties with america and refuse to acknowledge their existence.I'd also triple the woefully inadequate benefits that unemployed/disabled people exist on and tax the rich heavily to pay for this.
I'd better stop now before your man accuses me of being a Bolshevik.Smile
Never heard such Marxist nonsense in my life. If you give disabled people everything on a plate, Goblin, there'll be no encouragement for them to help themselves. My opponent must acknowledge that my policies are far better: I don't see why the rich, who work hard for their livings and don't earn money off property and no work, should get to keep more of it. Also, my opponent makes a very unsuitable and distasteful dichotomy between support for blind/VI people and those with other, sometimes more serious, disablements. As your president I would ensure that the disabled capable of work would receive assistance to find it, and hopefully make money equal to that of the rich my opponent so dislikes. aS your president I have already pledged to create a national health service. AS your president I would ensure that the defence forces were strong, whilst bringing the US back to the international community's table where it belongs. my opponent's marxist ideas would lead to a nation of lazy so and soes with no motivation to get out of be devery morning because the state were doing it all for them. I, on the other hand, believe that handouts should only be given to those both needy and deserving of them, whose disabilities prevent them from looking for work. So, vote Lawlord, you know it makes sense!
The Lawlord media relations department would like to make the following corrections to the latest press release: first, I would like to say that I meant that I don't see why the rich who work hard shouldn't get to keep more of it than the people who are poor because their most strenuous task all day is getting another beer from the fridge. Also, it should read 'getting out of bed every morning' rather than 'getting out of be devery morning'. My opponent would also doubtless keep ridiculous awards of punitive damages going, yet another reason why he is wrong and why the only president that can fit the bill is Lawlord.
What an arrogant arsehole didn't take long for you to reveal your true colours,
Arrogant arsehole? in what sense am I arrogant? I don't call having policies to try and create a better life for people arrogant; I don't call offering blind/vi people as well as others with disabilities assistance if they're looking for work arrogant; I don't call wishing the US to sign up to protocols on the environment to benefit the whole world arrogant; I don't call making the community safer by abolishing the right to bear arms arrogant; shall I go on? Or perhaps it's not the substance you have a problem with, perhaps it's my assertion that I'd do all these things a president. well, goblin, the whole point of this discussion is to say what we'd do if we were president so I was just getting into the role! Now, if my opponent has any constructive coment to make on the policies, I invite him to do so, but the fact that his most constructive response is to call me an arrogant arsehold says a lot more about him than it does about me. vote Lawlord!
Lawlord, why don't you visit the Ouch board and talk to some real people with disabilities and find how how very, very difficult it is for them to find work. In a world where even people without disabilities find it hard and face redundancy every day, how do you expect disabled people to cope when they have the added burden of prejudice and discrimination to face? You must know as well as I do that very few 'rich' people work hard for their money, most of them are handed it on a plate, and if you want an example hows about Mr David Beckham and many others like him for starters?! You know my views of the unfairness of how much lawyers/barristers etc. get paid when compared to civil servants, nurses, teachers to name but a few and I think you have made some very gross generalisations in your views of this country and its people. Frey.
Freya, thank you for this constructive response and you make some very good points. I'm not seeking to generalise in the way that gives offence that I think you might be hinting at. That's why I would, as president of the USA rather than Britain as this is what the discussion is about, offer assistance to disabled people who wished to find work. I am aware of the discriminatory barriers that stand in the way of disabled people at work or looking for work, but I am also very much aware as I am sure everyone on this board is, that many disabled people want to find work and actively look for it, which is exactly why I would offer them assistance as president. I think you generalise equally, freya, when you say that most rich people get money handed to them on a plate. I agree with you that some do, but I wouldn't go as far as saying most. finally, you have to acknowledge that there are some scroungers, for want of a better word. I don't say they are the majority, not a bit of it, but there are some who take the money away from the hardworking, decent folk who seek work but cannot find it because of discrimination. I would take money away from those people. I don't believe in gratuitously handing out money regardless, because in many senses it's patronizing and embodies itself almost as an expression of pity, disabled people have pride just like everyone else. so, to repeat, the policy would be to assist those who wish to find work and those who, for whatever reason, are unable to work, but to withdraw assistance from those not motivated enough to help themselves when they certainly could. a word about the rich, I fear that we shall never be ideologically reconciled on this one, though I respect your viewe. I am grateful to you, Freya, for your constructive contribution that's given me the opportunity to clarify things. and does the fact that you've taken no objection to the rest of the Lawlordian manifesto an endorsement of my campaign? Vote lawlord, for a fair deal for everyone!
You know .. regarding the disabilities plan. ;)
I've only once seen a system that makes sense with regards to disbaled people seeking work and that would come from Denmark.
There you get full compensation if you prove you cannot find a job for physical reasons or other inabilities. However the problem in most social systems is that the social security payments are withdrawn as soon as the disabled person finds a job. That way the prson could end up with a hard learning curve and sees no benefit from going out to find the job and prefers staying at home, especially since the job might pay not much better (in some cases )worse) than the job would. In Denmark they came up with the quite brilliant solution of haveing the social security office offer to pay part of the worker's sallaries if a company employed a disabled person while he/she is getting into the job (for the first 6 months I think) and made sure the person working and trying to adjust received over-all about 20 to 25% more than they would have on disability allowance alone. I think this is a good idea .. that way peole are motivated to find a job and it is all important to make them realize that it will enable them to be proud and live up to their potential. ;)
Over-all I would have to voe Lawlord so far .. I will have to more carefully review the slogans later <grin> as I am not entirely convinced yet.
If I were president, of the great land I wold do the following to improve the livelyhood of all. First I would reduce the micro management of our day to day lives by the government by putting the choice back in the hands of the single person. I would achieve this by legalizing all known drugs. By doing this it allows the government to place high taxes on the product. This may sound unfair, however look at the taxes placed on the sale of ciggeretts. I need not say more. I would also make it illegal to be caught on the streets under the influance of any of substance which is mind alturing or was once illegal. Enforceing stiff punishment for those caught will reduce the likelyhood that people will kill others while under the influance. I would like to inpose the three strike law for those who are caught drunk driving. Revoking the offender's license just isn't enough. When they put others in danger knowingly and willfully they hearby give up their right to coexist. Further more, I would allow the resturants to have the person sign a waver when ordering raw meat. The responceability belongs to the person ordering the raw meat, not the resturante. I would do a recall to the educational system. The idea that students are more well rounded by taking all these corses is hog wash. I would propose corses which focous on strengthing that person's main goal. Well rounded is great for those in elementry and middle school, however when students get to high school their focous should be on acheving a goal. Some might say that thirteen and fourteen is earily to start planning their lifes, however by the time they get to college, they s should have a direction. Millions of students spend their first two years drifting in college and getting into debt. That is unexseptable. National healthcare is paramount to breaking the class barriers in our great nation. eqquality should start with health care. Finally America should concentrate on americans, therefor if I were to become your presadent I would no longer use our millatairy as the world police and watch dog. Our boys should be home with their wives and children fight those who would harm us on our lands not those who harm others on their land.
Dragonfire for prese!
I have to take great exception to my opponent Dragonfire's policies on military deployment. I am afraid that America is one of the greatest nation in the world, and certainly the most powerful, and therefore has a responsibility to the world. Just like the British peacekeepers in Bosnia, Iraq and the like, Americans should help advance the freedom and democracy that they help bring to the world. dragonfire's isolationist agenda would make the american regime even more disliked than it is now, and would ultimately lead to more terrorism as a result. No matter how large your army is, it cannot deal with a menace such as that, and the british have experience of this. In addition, the concept of signing waivers before a meal, I'm afraid, is quite out of the question. A Lawlordian government will strike at the heart of the compensation culture in the US by abolishing juries in civil trials, and depoliticising the judiciary. As for dragonfire's ideas on education, as your president I would not discourage the setting of personal goals, but one of the reasons why 42 percent of American high school students could not name a country in asia was that the education system was not well-rounded and global enough. besides, what better way of understanding the place of one's nation in the world than actually studying others? The idea that by the age of fourteen, children's horizons should be narrowed focusing towards a specific goal is not part of a fair deal for everyone, and as president my government would not implement it. I have not yet considered the proposals on sentencing that Dragonfire puts forward, but would only draw attention to the controversy that the three strikes and you're out rule provokes in the case of minor convictions. To be tough on crime is one thing, to reduce opportunities for criminality is another, and the Lawlordian government will seek to do both. i now know why I appointed wildebrew my chancellor, his proposal on disability captures the spirit of what I was trying to say to a tee. Nobody should be brought up in a mentality that suggests they shouldn't try finding work or try bettering themselves because they are disabled or in some other way disadvantaged, such an attitude would relegate disabled people to third class citizens of the community seen as of no use to anyone. instead, as your president, I shall introduce legislation if your constitution allows me to do that into congress to force through measures implementing the denmark model, which should strike at the heart of the negativity culture. And I do not change my position on the international criminal court: if you elect me as your president, America will once more be sat at the international community's table, where it belongs and where it must be if it wishes to contribute positively to the world and keep its own people safe as a result. Vote Lawlord, and restore America's pride!
Lawlord honey, I think you may have let this thread go a teensy bit to your head don't you? I'm afraid the reason that I didn't object to the rest of your Lawlordian manifesto is that I didn't get around to reading it for one reason or another, I'm sure I would have objected if I had ?? I think most of what you are proposing just would not work in the real world, for example just how do you separate the wheat from the chaff? How would you have the resources, staff, money etc. to distinguish between the 'scroungers' as you call them and the genuine people out there in need of benefits and unable to find work hmmmm??
Frey.
Ok, Lolord. you are slowly winning me on many of your issues. In this country, however, there are some people who live in section 8 housing, not because they can't work, but because they *won't* work. They are perfectly able, but they enjoy a life of monthly welfare checks, foodstamps, and low-income housing. Many of these people drive cars which are too nice for their income level, obtained from dealing drugs and the like. Their children learn to have babies at young ages, and none of the kids are fully related. What will you do about these people? Will they be allowed to continue to receive government handouts for being lazy?
Kragiel - no! no! no! they shall not be allowed, if they are able to look for work, to lounge around in bed till mid-day moneylaundering off the state! As your president I shall bring prosecutions against those people, regrettably few in number it must be admitted, who are caught. Freya, I'm not letting it go to my head honestly, just enjoying myself! So vote Lawlord, for the fair deal for everyone!
Good! They need to be brought to justice! You can find them very easily! Are there people who are like this in your country as well?
Indeed, people like that in our country exist. As your president I solemnly pledge to be as compassionate and even-handed but at the same time as ruthless, as a great nation like the United States requires. So vote Lawlord, for fairness, justice and just deserts for everyone!
Would that be the Sahara or the Kalahari President Lawlord hmmmm? And may I be your deputy when you become Presi? I mean you'll need a lot of help to get all those policies in action won't ya....?
Deputy Frey. PS when is the election btw?
He'll have to be president after we get the constitution changed for Arnald. They say he's trying to put something through to get it done, so if it ever happens, you can come over and run, Lolord.
Well, the election will be on such day as the secretary of state may appoint, but don't worry, Americans all, we shall actually count the votes in this election which might be something you're not used to, but it is the general idea of an election you know. I'm going to abolish the electronic way of voting, so unless you have a good excuse for wanting a postal vote or a proxy voter, you're gonna have to haul your arses to a polling station where you will put a cross next to the candidate you want. it's easy, honestly. So vote Lawlord, the president that the voters want!
But so far there appears to be only one candidate in this election...we won't need to vote then eh? Frey.
All the best elections have only one candidate, it's so much easier. So vote Lawlord, the one and only!
Sit down. Shut up. Do as your told. If you are compliant, you might get chocolate. Once we've dealt with the evils of the non-workers, then we shall dispatch the overweight, the unattractive, and anyone who dares inconvenience us. Then it will be Utopia, until of course we start destroying those with the wrong hair and eye color of course. Bwahahahahaaaaa!
the election date is set for Monday 8th November. Polls open at 7 AM GMT and close half an hour later. Voe lawlord!
Election is today LL, have you counted the vote yet? Will we be opening the champers later hmmmm....Frey.
The votes have now been counted and the results are as follows: Lawlord, (Conservatives for america Alliance), 97489675 votes. I declare Lawlord duly elected as president of the United States of America, and the first British ruler of that teritory since His Majesty King George III. Well that result comes as no surprise as Lawlord was the only candidate, but once again the american opinion polls got it wrong as they predicted that Lawlord would lose.
Sounds like a little bit of a landslide to me LL, are you sure this election wasn't fixed hmmmm??
Elections fixed? In america? The most transparent, reliable electoral system in the world? the land of the free? Nobody could fisx an election in america, at least not until the year 2000.